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21 Articles

Stories listed here talk about gender language, with the most recent at the top.
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I also got sent home once because I came straight from work and was wearing pants instead of a skirt. Those days are past, thank goodness.

I am pursuing being a positional contra caller. It will make me a better caller, if I can figure out how to do it well, and I think it will make our dancers better, too. Our contra group is open…

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Gender free terms lower people’s expectations about the person coming toward them in line, allowing them to just enjoy rather than attempt control

I prefer gender free role terms because I find myself freer to dance either role, because as a female presenting person the regular comments about why I’m in the ‘wrong’ place (when I’m not) or comments about how I’m a…

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We had encountered more animosity in that one dance in our regular dance community than all the previous years dancing there combined!

I have been to many dances where gendered calling is the norm and it consistently leaves me frustrated and at times has made me question whether to continue. In gendered calling communities I have experienced the expectations of what I…

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I was in my 20s and 30s in the 1980s and 1990s when the dances were such flirt-fests. I wish I could redo that time with the sensibilities of today

I love being able to dance either role. It has opened up a whole new world to me. I used to be bored, but now I know that I can give myself a pleasant challenge at any time by switching…

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Dancing the “ladies” role hurts my right hip. It was a lovely relief when we switched to larks & robins to not be called a “gent” 100 times in an evening!

I am a 65 year old woman. For years I exclusively danced the “gent” role because dancing the “ladies” role hurts my right hip. It was a lovely relief when we switched to larks & robins to not be called…

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Gendered language and expectations mean that I can’t dance with half of the dancers in the room

I want to be able to dance with all of my friends, and gendered language and expectations mean that I can’t dance with half of the dancers in the room, which sucks. People should be able to dance with everyone.

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It’s brought tears to my eyes and given me hope that I could begin to feel fully respected and celebrated for dancing whichever role I want, without criticism, without having to defend myself

Growing up in our Contra, Square, and English dance communities, I’ve always danced both roles, because why not? Children aren’t born with binary gender beliefs — those limits are taught and imposed. As a cisgender little girl dancing in the…

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Every Mother’s Day I feel excluded, less than whole, marginalized, and shunned. But should I expect the world to stop calling mothers by that word

One of the deepest regrets in my life is that I have not had children. It was my dream to be a mother, and every Mother’s Day I feel excluded, less than whole, marginalized, and shunned. But should I expect…

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I love being able to dance either role

I love being able to dance either role. It has opened up a whole new world to me. I used to be bored, but now I know that I can give myself a pleasant challenge at any time by switching…

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When a dance is called using gendered terms, it signals to me that the dance community has ideas of what women “should” do and what men “should” do

I choose my dance partners based on things like “this person is new and would benefit from an experienced partner” or “this person is my friend and I’d like to spend time with them.” I don’t choose my partners based…

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