I choose my dance partners based on things like “this person is new and would benefit from an experienced partner” or “this person is my friend and I’d like to spend time with them.” I don’t choose my partners based on who I want to date or who I find attractive.

When a dance is called using gendered terms, it signals to me that the dance community has ideas of what women “should” do and what men “should” do, and that the dance community believes that a man and a woman are the foundational unit for dance, for society, and for families. As someone who was raised by a lesbian couple, this makes me feel like me and my family are not welcome.